


Half-Pint

by mintwitch



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-01
Updated: 2012-07-01
Packaged: 2017-11-08 22:49:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/448417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mintwitch/pseuds/mintwitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My one and only foray into M-Preg. A terrible failure, but mildly entertaining, nonetheless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Half-Pint

**Author's Note:**

> All characters and situations from Queer as Folk are properties of Russell T. Davies, Ron Cowen and Daniel Lipman, Showtime, and others. No copyright infringement is intended.

"Do I look different to you?" Brian's doing that thing he does with the mirror, where he poses and purses his lips and gives himself smoky come-hither glances, except not. This time he's looking vaguely dissatisfied, as if his body is a stranger, and a not terribly attractive one at that. Considering Brian’s narcissism, it’s almost alarming.  
  
“No. Well, the sweatpants are um... new.” And ugly, but Justin doesn’t mention that part.  
  
“I’ve gained a half-pound,” Brian announces, petulant as Gus without his Boo-bear. He wanders back to the bed and looks down at Justin. “I’m going to the gym.”  
  
Pulling the duvet over his head, Justin sighs. “Whatever.”  
  
***  
  
The next morning, Brian panics. Justin wakes up as he’s forcibly rolled out of bed, without so much as a blowjob.  
  
“Wake the fuck up, Sonny boy!”   
  
“Mrhphmpl?”  
  
“Up! You’re driving me to the emergency room.” He cracks an eyelid and looks up at Brian, fully dressed, standing over him. An impeccably shod foot pokes him in the side. “Up!”  
  
“Why are you wearing a suit to the emergency room?” A valid question, since Brian is still unemployed, and has been living exclusively in old jeans and wife-beaters for the past few weeks.  
  
“The doctor might be hot.” Brian’s logic is impossible to argue with; it’s hard to debate things that make absolutely no sense whatsoever. “Now, up.”  
  
***  
  
“So, what’s wrong?” The tumbler of coffee Brian had waiting is finally having its caffeinated way with Justin’s blood chemistry, and it occurs to him to wonder what the emergency is. “Why are we going to the hospital? Are you sick?”  
  
“Justin,” Brian says seriously, eyes compassionate, voice soft. “I... yes. I’m dying.”  
  
“What?!?!?!” He briefly loses control of the car, and they swerve into the next lane to a chorus of honks and beeps, before Justin gets hold of himself. “How long have you known? What is it? Are you... sick?”  
  
“Since this morning.” Brian’s face is the very epitome of ‘tragic countenance’ and a thousand other clichés of doomed love and deathbed declarations. “I’ve gained another quarter pound.”  
  
It’s all Justin can do not to pull over, yank Brian out of the car, and beat the living shit out of him. Dying, yeah, right. That could be arranged... Justin leans grimly over the steering wheel and accelerates slightly.  
  
***  
  
The nurse is amused. Brian is being stoic, in an over-the-top drama queen sort of way, and it’s not the first time Justin’s noticed that Brian at his worst can out-flame Emmett without even trying.   
  
Brian is submitting (oh, so brave, ever the hero, little bitty violins, blah blah blah) to having his pulse and blood pressure taken. Despite his rigid posture, there is a vague impression of stooped shoulders and the muted sighs are driving Justin insane. He hopes the doctor is a dyke. An ugly dyke. An ugly, fat dyke. Huge and butch and mean.  
  
***  
  
“Well,” Dr. Kathy Potter loops her stethoscope around her neck and smiles at the pair. “You’re in excellent health, just retaining some water. Has your diet or routine changed recently?”  
  
Brian shrugs and glowers. Dr. Potter is a dyke, proving that God loves Justin more than Brian. Justin answers for him, since Brian is heavily into denial at the moment. “Yeah, he lost his job a while back. Would that do it?”  
  
She bestows a charming smile on Justin. “If it impacts the amount of physical activity he’s getting, sure.”  
  
That would do it. No more quickies in the garage, elevator, on his desk. Justin nods to encourage her to continue.  
  
“Either that or he’s pregnant,” she laughs, and Justin chuckles with her, as Dr. Potter turns to Brian. “Just drink more water, and if your body doesn’t adapt, call your regular doctor for a check-up.”  
  
***  
  
Brian hasn’t said a word since the doctor made the pregnancy crack, so Justin is surprised when Brian stops him just inside the loft door.  
  
“What?” he asks.  
  
Batting his eyelashes, Brian smirks at him. “I hope this one’s a girl.”  
  
“You are such a freak.”

 


End file.
